3:00am :
"Suzy............Suzy are you awake? I need to you listen.....mommy and I are both here............your Granny passed away a little bit ago from a heart attack..........."
Granny's Last Picture August 2006Silence from my end of the phone...
all these thoughts running through my head:
* thank God it was quick and relatively painless
* what a blessing that she will finally be with her husband that she has been missing for SO long now.
* she will reunite with the son and daughter she has already had to bury in her lifetime
And the thought that most grips me now, at 4:15am while I am puffy-eyed and sleep deprived, is....when was the last time I saw her?...I am plagued with it. Surely it wasn't Christmas 2005, a whole YEAR ago. My mind races, but I cannot place it. When was the last time I spoke to her? Did she know how much I loved her? - How often I thought of her?...What was the last thing I told her? Did she know how much I loved her and how much our whole family adored and looked up to her?
Clara Laman was truly amazing...INCREDIBLE. She is everything I, and every other member of my family, hope to be one day. Marrying at a very young age, to a man who was twice her age, my grandmother and grandfather had a strong, Christian marriage- full of love and happiness- that lasted until the day he died at age 90, when I was a small child. Needless to say, longevity definitely runs in my family. They had nine children, YES NINE! There was Bobby, Johnny, Alan (who died soon after childbirth), Bonnie (who lost her battle to breast cancer several years ago), Patsy, Betty, David, Judy, & Jany. After delivering 7 babies, my grandmother learned that she was pregnant yet again! She did not know that she would be delivering healthy identical twin girls, until the day she gave birth! (CRAZY! That just blows my mind! I would have fainted!) My mom, Jany, is the youngest of those twins girls. So, as you can see, we have a family as big as a small country! ;)
July 2005My grandmother had the BIGGEST heart! She LOVED her children, grand-children, great grand-children, and great great grand-children! (Can you imagine? Great-great-grandchildren?) She LOVED animals and wouldn't even kill bugs that crawled their way into her house. She would always be humming and singing church songs while cooking breakfast early in the morning, or lunch or dinner....really, anytime for that matter. Oh, gosh......how I'm going to miss hearing her singing around the house. She was such a strong woman who lived independently in her own house, by herself, even at the age of 91! She would have turned 92 this December 23rd.
I am saddened to think that my mother has now lost both her father and her mother. I cannot even begin to comprehend that feeling...
I will be leaving shortly to go to work today, but plan on driving to Waco early this afternoon and then onto to Brackettville, Texas to be with my family for the rest of the week. Please, please keep my family in your prayers.
Mother's Day weekend 2004
