Wednesday, September 21, 2011

A Hard Pill to Swallow

Hey Suz, maybe your *darling* daughter is sassing her teachers because she is mimicking what she sees…

09 september 2011 057

OUCH.

 

Yep, I went there with myself this morning- doing some reflection during my daily quiet time.

(For the record, I had Sav pose for me this morning with her crazy bed hair and mean face---but I actually get this face quite often)

 

You know how I was super stressed and trying to find advice on how to balance life?- You guys were gold and I truly appreciate all of your responses and suggestions. PURE GOLD, I tell ya.

 

The reoccurring theme was that I need to make a schedule and plan out my week (activities, meals, etc.)- something that I used to be very good at doing. However, when I birthed quads, I had to learn to roll with the punches and go with the flow---be able to adapt to unexpected situations on a daily basis… so, I had gotten out of the habit of being so “scheduled”.

 

I’m realizing that “scheduled” isn’t a bad word after all (ahem, Casey Gerwer & Teryn Todd--thank YOU!)- but something that makes my life easier and more manageable. I have also realized that if I have any chance of working out- it is imperative for me to go early in the morning before the kids wake up (when I actually have energy!)…and I’m a morning person who wakes up with a smile on my face anyway (just ask my friends!)---so there is really no excuse.

 

The new and improved Suz started this week with her new and improved schedule (with help from my BFF, Mari):

I wake up early and head to the gym. When I come home, I take a shower and chat with Joe until he leaves for work (precious quality time that I was missing by sleeping in every morning)- then I sit down to have quiet time with my devotional book (Day-Votions for Mothers) and spend some time with my Father.

day-votions

 

 

Now, usually- the kids wake up EVERY SINGLE DAY between 6 and 6:15am- no matter what! It is so frustrating! (I need to get one of those OK-to-Wake clocks).

alarm clock

 

 

But here is the awesome part- ever since Joe and I have been waking up early and starting our days off right, the children have been miraculously sleeping past seven ‘o clock!!!! SEVENNNNN!!!!!!!

Keep in mind- they haven’t slept in that long in over a YEAR! Coincidence? I think not. No doubt that God is blessing our time.

 

So this morning- the ‘ole Day-votion hit me pretty hard. Here are some quotes from the book:

- Our children are just kids, not little adults. They haven’t mastered the art of patience. Neither have we as moms. But we are the nurturers. We are the ones to lead by example.

- Children often mimic what they see and hear

09 september 2011 056

- Does anger make me feel superior to my kids? Is that the fuel that feeds my impatient spirit at times?

- Anger begets anger.

- Gentleness is power under control.

- As I changed- guess what?- so did my children.

- Sometimes God lets our children be the teachers. At those times, we would be wise to listen- and learn.

 

Mama most definitely needs to work hard at leading by example with a spirit of gentleness- so that my children can feel accepted, loved and secure. And I have to admit- this is SOOOOO difficult for me when my kids are fighting or being disrespectful! Especially when I feel my blood boiling and heart beating out of my chest!

Winking smile

 

I will post pics from our Mama/Daddy weekend with twins- but just wanted to share my heart this morning. XOXO

 

Happy Hump Day, Blogger Peeps!

suz signature

35 comments:

BrownEyedGirlsMom said...

Great post Suz!!

Shelly said...

Thank you so much for this post, I really needed it today. I only have one child but my blood boils a lot with him and I know I don't handle most situations with a gentle spirit. I need to really work hard to change that or I'm gonna be in big trouble when he grows up!

MEGAN said...

Suz,
I started reading a book, 1000 Gifts, by Ann Voskamp. The book has CHANGED MY LIFE, and I'm 1/2 way through it. What I try to do, in the angry moments, is pray for the things I'm grateful for, and my attitude changes.

Thank you for sharing!

Page said...

Great post! I really need this reminder of patience and to stop expecting my child to be a little adult!! Thank you!

Debbie said...

Thanks for sharing! And love the pictures of Sav

Anonymous said...

What a beautiful post and a reminder to us all...and my one and only child is in her late 20's!

Two things I heard recently were---

"there is such a thing as reasonable effort" - I love this as i kill myself trying to do it all, all the time...

"kids are not careless but carefree" this was actually posted on the road for people to watch out for kids.....how often we do view them as little adults...

Amanda said...

So true! My sweet little 2-year old has turned into a yeller, and it's hard to accept that she's learned this behavior from Mama. I'm also working very hard on my own attitude, particularly around my little sponge.

Laura said...

Love reading your blog, but I don't think I've ever commented! Yes...get the clock. I have twin boys, and it is one of the best investments we have ever made. They love it, and for some reason, it keeps them in their rooms until it turns green when nothing else would! They come out of their rooms every morning and nap time yelling, "GREEN!" I do the same thing by getting up and working out before they get up...otherwise, it would not happen!
Laura

Charla (SHar-la) said...

Oh how I needed to hear your heart this morning! And I am thinking I need to pick up a copy of the Day-Votions!!

Pam said...

Sounds like you have it all under control.....not that you never did, you always have, just needed to step back and take a deep breath. A little change will do a person good. Keep up the good work as you have always done. Your friend in East Texas, Pam.

jenny winstead said...

LOVED. THIS!!!! thank you thank you for being willing to admit that you don't have it all together! that's awesome about the kids sleeping until 7! i love when God blesses out of our obedience. :)

Jenni said...

Thank you for this post. I really needed it. Dealing with the terrible 2s and the impossible 3s is getting the best of me. My 3 year old has starting giving me the look and I know he gets it from me.

Beth said...

Thank you. I really needed to read this today. I just put my quads down for nap while yelling. Not good.

I try to remind myself that if I am going to teach them self-control, I need to model self-control.

The quads just turned three and my buttons get pushed every day, but this is the time for me to react gently. I need to take back my mornings like you have. I've never really been a 'morning person', but right now my life doesn't give me a choice. If I want any quiet me time where I'm not already worn out, I need to get my butt out of bed and make it happen.

How did you know I needed to hear this today?

Sarah said...

Thank you Suz!! You have no idea how much I needed this!! I have gotten into a bad rut of yelling and having no patience. I need this and I needed this bad!!! Thank you!! It's sometimes hard, b/c you feel you are all alone with having those "bad mom" moments, but it's nice to know that other people go thru them and we aren't bad moms, we just are off track!!

Joni said...

Thank you so much for this honesty, Suz. All mamas wrestle with this, and I appreciate you sharing that with us! It's a blessing to see God working in you and meeting you where you are!

Happily Married said...

What a great reminder for me! I loved this post! I think I'll be pushing some pennies aside each week to buy that book soon. It's so nice to hear YOU come through in your posts as a REAL mom. Knowing that, even though I only have two, they can push my buttons like pros and I need to respond with gentleness. THANK YOU!

Mel Tales said...

Thanks girl! I needed to hear that! I am dealing with teens and pre-teens right now and I SO need to be more patient and gentle and be the example!

xoxo, Melanie

The Murray Crew said...

Suz, I think so many of us can relate! It's crazy how much my attitude (and lack of gratitude) can rub off on my boys when I choose to be overwhelmed/selfish/angry over patience/self-control/kindness.

They learn by example - and what an AWESOME responsibility we have on our hands. =)

I LOVE the book 1000 Gifts by Ann Voskamp as well, and it's so applicable to our lives. Highly recommend.

Oh also, Organized Simplicity is GREAT by the author of the Simple Mom website. I'm in the middle of it now and it's SO GOOD.

Praying for you, Friend! Thanks for sharing your heart!

Katie and Matt said...

Hi, I'm Katie from Utah and I found your blog through some blog hopping a couple of weeks ago :) I am a mom to 2 1/2 year old b/g twins. I really needed this post!! Going through potty training and transitioning into toddler beds has made me into a little bit of a yeller. Thank you for being inspired to write about gentleness being power under control. This will be my new mantra through these trying times!!

Lauren said...

Oh my gosh, I'm reading the same devotional! I've been a slacker and haven't picked it up in about a week. You've just inspired me to have some quiet time tonight (I'm the opposite of you, night is when I'm at my best in terms of working out, getting things done, etc). I love that your kids started sleeping in when you started working time with Joe into your morning routine. God's hand at work for sure!

Catherine said...

Thank you so much! This is exactly what I needed to hear today. God used you to speak to my heart.

Since I adopted my precious daughter from China almost 2 years ago (single Mom by choice) I have let my devotions go. Toddler devotions alone just don't cut it for me even though I cherish that time with my DD.

The part you wrote about anger also spoke to my heart as it is something I'm working on too. As my DD hits a defiant stage I need to mirror to her how to react to things and sadly sometimes the mirror she has been seeing is something not nice at all. Working on and praying about reacting with a gentle spirit even when she dumps her entire bowl of cereal and milk upside down just because she feels like it. Gentle reactions.

Thank you! I'm going to look up that devotional too.

Grandma Honey said...

I've always heard that rising early is the healthiest way to live. Although I don't do that ;) I should!

So where do you make up your sleep? do you take a nap? Or go to bed early? It would take lots of discipline to go to be early when the house is quiet.

You're such a good mother!

Jodi said...

OH my gracious, I soooooooooo needed to read/hear that today! Thanks so much for sharing your heart!

{K} said...

Love this post! So much great advice and stuff I definitely need to learn dealing with my kids too!!

Anonymous said...

I've been reading your blog for a long time but don't believe I've commented before. Thank you for this post. It really hit home for me (as well as your earlier post on "balance") Thanks for the advice and for sharing your life. You have such a beautiful family.

Katie Lewis said...

I have always, always loved your blog, but I must say I really like the new direction it has taken with discussing the stresses of being a mom of multiple kiddos :) I have 5 - 14,7,5,4, and 3 and there are days where all I feel like I did was yell and throw a grown-up temper tantrum...not good. Thank you so much for the reminder to stop and think about our words and our attitude. I do know that when I'm calm and talk nicely to them (through my frustration), I get a much better response..it's just hard to remember that in the moment! I read a quote (on pinterest <3) that said "Remember you are not managing an inconvenience, you are raising a human being" and I try to say it in my head when I feel my blood starting to boil! :)

Audrey T said...

Hi - it's been a long time, Suz! But I'm in the same boat - in the last few weeks, I've realized the beauty and power in having a constant routine for Sammy. He's a different kid, and I'm a different mom.

We've established a "7" rule for the mornings. It's only okay to get out of bed if the first number on the clock is 7. Easier than buying a new clock, and he LOVES to check and make sure.

4 J's said...

I sure needed to hear this today! Thanks for sharing what the Lord is teaching you.

Stephanie said...

Thank you for your post! I have been struggling in this area so much and some of the quotes from the devo really hit home with me. Thank you!

Jill said...

Wow, this post hit home with me! It makes me so sad to see the qualities I don't like about myself coming out in my kids because of my poor example. Remember, you're a great mom and no one is perfect, but it's definitely commendable that you try!!

Barbara Manatee said...

OMG...those pictures are cracking me up!!

So glad you're finding some time for YOU. I finally made time for me this year as far as taking care of myself - joined a gym for the first time since the kids were born, have lost weight, and feel so much better about me - not only how I feel but know I have an outlet!

Glad you're getting yours too!

12-arrows said...

you really encouraged me and I've been doing this "mom" gig for a very long time now. Thank you for sharing your heart and for sharing your day-votions. I'm gonna check into getting that book! Blessings to you.

Jennifer said...

Hi! I just stumbled onto your blog for the first time. My hubby is an Aggie (Class of '95), so we have something in common already. :-) I am an Aggie now by marriage!

I enjoyed reading this post and many thanks for the book referral...I'll have to check that out.


~jennifer

Anonymous said...

Thanks for posting this - I could use a lesson in patience and gentleness these days. It's so easy to let frustration get the better of me! Your idea of the daily quiet time for reflection is great.

-Holly

Trina said...

Suz, this is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you for posting with honesty...you are not alone. I have 3 year old twins and an almost one year old and I am so impressed with your positivity and get-things-done mentality.
Love your blog!
Trina

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