A month or so ago, I bought tickets for my Mom, Savi and myself to attend the Mary Poppins Musical in Dallas. Well…Little Miss Priss has had some, ahem, “rough” days at school and with other authoritative figures (to put it mildly).
Savannah Leigh Steece is a very strong-willed, independent little girl, and is having a difficult time trying to understand that SHE is NOT in control and that the ADULTS are in charge. Fun times.
The week before the musical, Sav’s behavior at school and at home was A-W-F-U-L. I wasn’t about to reward her with a special trip to a musical.
Hardest. Thing. Ever. It KILLED me, but she HAS to learn! We have tried EVERYTHING! (taken things away like all of her stuffed animals, hair products, dress up clothes; given her things for good behavior; given the boys things for good behavior that she misses out on; sticker charts, time outs, spankings~ gasp! yes spankings for defiant disrespect; talked to her one-on-one on her level, etc.)…and nothing works.
I was tossing and turning and just so upset about it…when I thought~ “I know! I’m going to buy 2 more tickets for all of the boys to come!” And REALLY use this as a learning experience for Sav.
(Ben, Ethan, Andrew)
Joe was concerned that the boys wouldn’t enjoy the musical… to which I responded, “Dudebro, its like one of their favorite movies!”… and he agreed that something big must be done to try to “reach” Sav.
Ben, Granna, and Drew
Ethan, Me, and Andrew
Ethan holding the Playbill
…and then it all went downhill from there!
Okay, Joe. You win. I will never take the boys to another musical/play again. Oh man…they were SOOOOO ready to go and it was SOOOOOO hard trying to keep them quiet for other patrons! Needless to say, we got the heck outta there at intermission! SHEESH!
Oh- and don’t feel sorry for Savannah, before we left, she went and put in the Mary Poppins DVD and was all smiles: “Mom! Take some pictures for me!” (I’m tellin’ ya…this girl is ROCK SOLID).
Sav has improved with this whole attitude and obedience thing. She goes through waves, I guess. I tell ya, this parenting thing is for the BIRDS sometimes. But Joe and I are doing our best and we are extremely consistent….so, here’s hoping that consistency and a boatload of prayer will help mold her into a beautiful, strong, independent child of God and she will use it for GOOD!
AMEN, right?!
This past weekend was another BOYS DAY---but this time, it was to see Thomas the Train!…definitely more their style.
21 comments:
I so feel you...except my little one is only 20 months. I have to say you haven't given me much hope for an end in sight! :-) I, too, was one of those strong-willed children and I turned out pretty good. Sounds like you and Joe are doing a great job with her. I'm with you, though. Discipline is totally for the birds. I guess that's why there are so many undisciplined children these days. Ain't nobody got time (or patience) for that! Keep it up!
Have you read 1,2,3 Magic for Christian Parents? We have a very strong willed child too and this book is about the only thing that has helped. It has mixed reviews, but it worked for us after trying all of the same things you just listed that you have tried.
hahaha this cracked me up! i have 3 boys and 1 girl also. parenting boys and girls are just two totally different worlds!!
yeah I think the full musical show will be too 'heavy' for young kids.
I don't know if you have similar like this in Texas, but here in LA, there is Santa Monica playhouse where they have musical show for kids.
the show is only 1 hour so it's not too long for them. and everyone is allowed to laugh and interact with the casts as well during the show. it's so much fun for the kids.
we just went to their Beauty And The Beast show last October with my 7 y.o. son and 1 y.o. daughter and we all had a blast.
I think this is a good way to introduce musical to kids. :)
btw, always love your blog! :)
I feel your pain!! One of my twins sounds just like Sav! Good luck momma...like you, we've tried everything! We are finishing up kindergarten and she has gotten better as the year has gone on. Still very head strong, but at least understanding that she's not the boss all the time.
My oldest daughter was strong willed - I used to tell her when she was in her teens to never try to convince me that anyone talked her into doing anything, if she did something it was because she decided to - head like a mule. Now that she is in her 20's, she is a great Christian young woman, so hang in it will get better!
My prayers are with you and your strong willed little girl.
TWO THUMBS UP FOR CONSISTENCY!!!! I'm a teacher and I know you just gotta keep trucking and not let anything slide. Keep it up!!! It will pay off. I PROMISE.
So I had a biter. He was actually a very good natured kid and quite well-liked by his victims, but the biting had to stop. We tried everything, but it continued. On the advice of the preschool teacher - yes, he was 4 and still biting - everyone was instructed to tone down the reaction to the biting. It worked very quickly, they were absolutely correct that the big, although negative, reaction he was getting to the biting was egging him on. So instead of yelling and time-outs, he got a simple "no" or "cut it out" and then ignored when he bit. It worked really quickly.
Haha! Poor mama. I can only imagine my Kailey is going to be like that when the kids are older. Eek! Even from "afar" on Facebook and blogging, I totally admire that parents that you and Joe are and continue to become. Y'all are doing such a great job and Mike and I both hope to accomplish the same. Keep the faith! And no more musicals with the boys! ;)
Can I just say how much I loved the fact that one of the punishments was taking away hair products? Love it. Stay strong. You are doing great!
Oh my gosh. I have no advice to offer. I just wanted to let you know I just about peed myself laughing so hard at your description of Savi "take pictures for me!" What a little stinker.
If it makes you feel better, I was a total monster at that age too. I'm 30 now and I think it's safe to say I grew out of it. (Most days :) )
Consistency - Amen. You have got it going on!
Sorry you are having troubles with Sav :( Each child has their own ways of acting out or expressing themselves! She will def be an individual allright :)
Good luck
xoxo
My daughter is very strong willed too - so bossy and thinks she is in charge. Consistency is key - keep up the good work! Looks like the other mamas here all have experience with tough cookie little girls.
I think Anonymous is on to something. Even Negative attention is attention, so Sav may be getting exactly the reaction she wants. Maybe ignoring or downplaying the behavior is worth a shot?
Way to stay strong, Mama! And I TOTALLY hear you about only making it til intermission. My hubby and I took our two boys (3 and 6) to see the Radio City Christmas Spectacular this last Christmas. I was convinced they'd love it and be mesmerized. Hubby did not...but he was sweet enough to not point his finger at me and say "I told you so!" when we left at intermission. Oh well!
I have an exciting little daughter as well. I'm always very tired at night! It's probably annoying when people recommend stuff but I LOVE Danny Silk's stuff. It has helped us SO much. The one to start with is Loving your kids on purpose. Love and logic is great too - similar to Danny Silk.
Valerie
I have an older daughter with son being "the baby". He is our strong willed one. I remember once after taking away tons of stuff because he wouldn't turn in his homework (that was done). I finally told him he couldn't watch the weather on the news if he didn't turn it in. He asks if he could stand in the hallway & listen to it, lol. The answer was no & he turned in his homework finally. Lol
You are so right. Parenting is hard. I always tell my kids I getting them in trouble so they will know the rules when they are adults. So hard. I think it is harder on us than them. You are doing a great job. I love your blog.
Wow, little Ms Savannah does see to win the Steece prize for the most stubborn and strong willed --- I wonder what she would have done if when you left and she said "I'll just watch it at home" If you would have said... Nope, the boys are going to watch the movie on the way taken it with you along with any other movie that she wanted to watch what she would have said?? Oh, my, well I suppose as difficult as this is for parenting those skills are going to make her one awesome strong lady when she is older!!
Haha, as much as she cracks me up.. I know it's just cuz she's not mine! (I'm a nanny but don't have my own.) What if you took away movies, since that's kinda what she turned to?
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